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Want to do something different for Valentines Day this year? Here are some great ones that we saw advertised:

  • You can pay to have a cockroach at the Bronx Zoo named after your spouse. The website states, “Flowers wilt. Candlelight fades. Roaches are forever.”
  • You can prearrange funeral arrangements for you and your spouse.
  • If you’re a DIY person, you can make your spouse a bouquet of bacon roses. 

Valentine’s Day is a big deal in our culture. Should we get excited about it? The good news about the day is that it serves as a pause to stop and do something for your spouse. The tough part is that many of us don’t know what would speak well to our spouse.

The Tension: Valentine’s Day can sometimes cause more disconnection than connection. 

  • If your spouse makes a move your direction for Valentine’s Day, even if it’s ‘typical’, it’s a good idea to accept it and see it as them making a move toward you. You can talk about the specifics later.
  • Embrace the unique, specific, “I know you” Valentine’s Day traditions. And sometimes that does mean flowers, depending on your spouse!

Afton: Hudson made me hand-made, watercolor Valentine’s our first year dating… and they were Harry Potter themed. I loved it so much I wanted to frame them.

  • Put a little note in your calendar that says, “think about Valentine’s Day” a few weeks before. Then start watching and listening for ideas.

Truth: To love your spouse intimately you must know them specifically.

We have some ideas for you based on things Ted has done over the years.

  1. Fiverr.com – For $5, you can get people to create all kinds of fun stuff. I had a guy from the jungle swing in on a vine and read a love note I wrote to my wife, Nancie. One year, I sent someone a picture of our dog and they animated him saying, “Happy Valentine’s Day Nancie!” She LOVED both.
  2. Poster – a few years ago I went to local print shop and had our wedding announcement from the newspaper blown up to poster size for $7.  I framed it with a cheap frame from Walmart. Nancie LOVED it. You can do similar things pretty inexpensively online or in store through Walmart Photo
  3. Wall art– Okay so this one took me some time, but Nancie REALLY LOVED it. Here goes:
    • Take a piece of 1.5ft by 1.5ft plywood and paint it (most home improvement stores have a pieces already cut or will cut it for you)
    • Cut two holes at the top
    • Paint it the color of your choice
    • Stencil or free-hand the message of your choice
    • Once the paint is dry, thread your rope through the holes, tie the ends in knots and it’s ready to hang

For some of you, this is all your wife will want. For others of you, you may need to do something additional like dinner, or a cruise for two to Tahiti. But make no mistake about it, something unique that took you just a little time will mean a lot!

One simple thing for this week: create something unique that takes just a little bit of time.

The point isn’t to copy ideas, it’s to do something that takes time and is specific to your spouse. Also, be a good gift receiver. Give them the benefit of the doubt when they try something!

Thanks for joining us for the Married People Podcast! We hope today’s episode helped you realize that marriage is a little easier than you may think. We hope you’ll subscribe to the podcast on iTunes and leave a review – they help us make the podcast better.